by Roseanna White | Aug 15, 2013 | Thoughtful Thursdays, Uncategorized
First, thanks for all the birthday wishes yesterday–I had an amazing day! Now on we go. =)
Sometimes reading the Old Testament can be baffling. We’re told that the Lord our God never changes, that He’s the same yesterday, today, and forever. Yet when we read about all that transpired in those early days with Israel, all the times He lashed out against someone for what we would deem nothing…well, that makes us go “Huh?”
I recently read the portion where Aaron’s sons lit a profane fire to the Lord, and He struck them down, three of them. Because it was there, I read a note on it–the note simply said that God wanted to be very clear about the rules of the Tabernacle, and they had disobeyed them.
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| Rembrandt – Balaam and his Ass |
I had to shake my head on that one. Because you know, in all these confusing places–where someone was commanded to be stoned for picking up sticks on the Sabbath, where Moses strikes the rock instead of speaking to it, where Balaam’s donkey has to talk because Balaam keeps trying to force the creature past an angel that came simply because he rose too early–there’s one obvious thing in common.
People are disobeying the letter of God’s word.
But beyond that, I think it’s this–that people are disobeying the spirit of God’s word.
Very rarely do the Old Testament writers provide us with motivation, beyond “they grew discontent” or “His anger was roused against them.” That’s all we hear. But what do we know? That God doesn’t change. And that God sees not our outward actions, but our inward heart.
My first realization of this was in Genesis, when Cain’s sacrifice is unacceptable to the Lord. Why, when we know He does in fact except produce as offering later? The only answer I see is that Cain didn’t give his best. It specifies that Able did, but just says Cain brought “some.” Some isn’t good enough for our Lord.
When the sons of Aaron lit a fire the Lord had not told them to light, what were they trying to do? And what would that fire have meant to the gods of the lands around them? Where they trying to take or conjure power not meant for them?
Was Moses too angry to follow the instructions God gave him? Did he think it not enough of a show to speak to the rock, even though the Lord then says he ruined the point with his outburst?
Motivations are what I allow myself to change and interpret when writing historicals, so I give them a lot of thought when reading these examples.
And I need to give them a lot of thought in my own life. Is my heart right when I’m performing the small tasks set before me? Do I turn astray even a degree with the thought that I want to do it my way instead of the way I know He wants me to do it? Do I greet clear, precise instruction with a “No”?
Maybe right motives aren’t always enough if we fail to do something–but wrong motives can destroy us. So Lord, cleanse my heart anew today…that I might hear those detailed instructions and obey them precisely.
Is there a particular Old Testament passage
that has always baffled you?
by Roseanna White | Aug 8, 2013 | Thoughtful Thursdays, Uncategorized
I’ll be honest–the week turned pretty crappy on me. I had a couple nasty-bad days there.
My first response? Wallow. Only, it’s hard to wallow with kids and a hubby who need me on my game, with a gazillion books still needing sent out and edits pending on the WhiteFire book releasing in one short week.
Maybe, were it just me in my cave, I’d wallow. But it’s not me–or not the me I can be right now anyway. I know everyone deals with disappointments in their own way. My best friend cries, my sister works out, I know some who opt for retail therapy.
I don’t really do any of that. It’s hard for me to get outside my head, but my head says I need to stay strong. Handle disappointments with grace. Easy? No. But I say a prayer, suck it up, and…well…get on with it. But it’s difficult sometimes. So I try to tweak my mindset. For me, that means getting out of the jammies and ponytail and showing the world I’m okay. I put on my favorite outfit, fix my hair, and even break out the makeup bag. This is a rarity, LOL. And maybe to some, it seems strange to go all-out just to sit at home in front of my computer. But when I look bad, I feel bad. When I take the effort to look better, I start to feel better. Call it vanity–maybe it is. But it’s also me taking control of something and making an effort to change my attitude.
Which leads me right into my party. =)
On August 14th, next Wednesday, I’m turning 31. So when a friend of mine from one of my writing groups asked me if I’d host an online Mary Kay party, I thought, “Oh, fun! It’ll lead straight into my birthday!!” This was before the week turned sour. 😉 But you know, I think it’s just what I need. A reason to look beyond blips on the screen and focus on something else.
I really want to support Terri Harr, one of my most dedicated readers and a friend to boot, as she’s launching this new enterprise. And she’s even promised a few goodies for giveaways down the line, if the party goes well!
So you are hereby invited to my online Mary Kay party, beginning today and extending through next Wednesday, my birthday. Obviously, I want you to buy lots, ’cause then I get free stuff, LOL. But I also just want to hang out here on the blog, chat about some simple things like mascara and lipstick, and support my friend in the process.
Here’s how it works–really simple.
1. Go to http://www.marykay.com/terriharr and browse through the catalogue.
2. Add whatever you please to your cart.
3. When you check out, put “Roseanna White Hostess” in the memo box
4. Voila! Your order will be sent straight to you!
5. Share with a friend. Cuz, you know, the more the merrier at this party. Since I don’t have to clean my house for it or anything. 😉
My question for you today:
What’s your default when you’re feeling down?
or
What item of makeup can you not live without?
by Roseanna White | Jul 11, 2013 | Giveaways and Contests, Thoughtful Thursdays
Day 10’s winner of Ring of Secrets is…
Sarah Keimig !
Keep entering all week for a chance at the daily book drawing AND Friday’s drawing for winner’s choice of one of these two necklaces by Susie Finkbeiner of Inspired Novelties.
And for today:
Thoughtful About . . . Words of Blessing
I decided, rather belatedly, to do the Bible-in-a-year schedule in the back of my new chronological Bible. I began on July 1, went through and penciled in all the new dates over the ones listed in the back, and got down to business last week.
As I’m reading through Genesis again, some things are jumping out at me that never have before. Today I read both Abraham’s blessing of Isaac and Isaac’s blessing, intended for Esau but given by deceit to Jacob.
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| Isaac Blessing Jacob by a student of Rembrandt |
Now, I’ve read these things half a gazillion times. I’ve heard sermons on them. I’ve wondered about them. But today, as my kids run through the room laughing while I read, I thought about them in a new way.
What was it about those words that these men so craved? What made them so important? So special? So binding?
I don’t exactly have the answers to that…but I have some thoughts. All through the Bible, both Old Testament and New, we see the power of words.
“In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God,
and the Word was God. All things were made through Him, and without Him nothing
was made that was made. In Him was Life, and the life was the light of men. And
the light shines in the darkness, and the darkness did not comprehend it.”
John 1:1-2
“Let your speech always be with grace, seasoned with salt,
that you may know how you ought to answer each one.”
Colossians 4:6
“So Samuel grew, and the Lord was with him and let
none of his words fall to the ground.”
I Samuel 3:19
“Now may our Lord Jesus Christ Himself, and our God and
Father, who has loved us and given us everlasting consolation and good hope by
grace, comfort your hearts and establish you in every good WORD and work.”
II Thessalonians 2:16, 17
Words created…words bless…words curse…
And we often use them so thoughtlessly! I’ve mused on this before, but today I’m thinking especially about how we use them with our children.
It wasn’t some random king that gave these blessings to the patriarchs. Sons didn’t vie for the blessing of their neighbor. It was always their father whose words they wanted. Their fathers who gave them words not only about the physical belongings he himself would pass down, but about how his son’s family would be received by the world for generations.
What is it about a parent’s words that can do that…and am I keeping that in mind when I talk to my kids?
Our local bishop tells a story of an extremely popular, powerful evangelist who had brought countless souls to Christ over the years. Every night of his childhood, this someday-preacher’s mother would kiss his forehead, give him a hug, and say, “The Lord has great plans for your life.” He grew up knowing that it, he lived the promise, and we now, years later, can see its truth.
So what truth am I speaking into the lives of those I love best? What am I teaching my kids, yes, but more, what am I promising them?
Because one thing I know for sure–God doesn’t change. If He honored the blessings spoken by a father upon a son in Abraham’s day, He’ll still do it today. If He poured out His peace upon a people at the word of their spiritual father in the New Testament, He’ll continue pouring it upon us now.
And that means a lot of responsibility to us–responsibility we often ignore, are ignorant of, or–dare I say it?–embarrassed to use. We feel silly saying such deep things to our little children, who just want to play Hulk or Princess or Super-Spy. What do they care about blessings?
Maybe nothing yet–but they will someday. And I should be looking ahead to that someday. I should be speaking blessing and promise and love upon my children each and every day, binding them not only to my heart, but to the Father’s.
When I was a girl, my parents always, always said, “You can be anything you want to be, do anything you want to do.”
That’s a blessing I’m living now, fueled by their faith in me and our Father. Thanks, Mom and Dad. 😉
Now what about me and my kids? What about you?
My question to you today:
What’s one promise or blessing or encouragement that has stuck with you through the years?
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by Roseanna White | Jun 27, 2013 | Thoughtful Thursdays, Uncategorized
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| The Dentist by Gerard van Honthorst, 1622 |
I can say in complete honestly that yesterday evening was just terrible. As in, took me all night to recover. Why, you ask? Because my daughter has a loose tooth.
Now, Xoe has lost four teeth already, and they were FINE. No pain, little bleeding, no prob’m. Yesterday, this tooth twisted into a very funny position and hurt every time she touched it. And my brave little princess who withstood a broken elbow with nary a whimper had a complete meltdown over this. As in, four solid hours of crying. And what really got me was what she was crying: “Get it out, get it out–but don’t touch it.”
Last night, I broke out all the philosophy and truisms I could think of. Though reasoning with a panicked 7-year-old…yeah, um, didn’t accomplish anything. But oh, how it got me thinking.
Because that, right there, is so often me. Not over the physical ouchies, those I can handle. But when we dig deeper–oh yeah. I can imagine God in the same agony I was in last evening, wanting so much to help me while I thrash around insisting He make it go away but not DO anything.
At one point last night, I said to my sweet girl, “Doing nothing will never accomplish anything. Ever. If you want something to change, you have to do something.”
Yet how often do we complain about something in our lives, beg and plead for God to change it, but then sit on our duffs and cry “Stop!” at the first twinge of unease? And much like tooth v. elbow, I’m not talking about the Big Stuff. I’m talking about the everyday.
We want to see our enterprises, our churches, our businesses, our online presences grow…but we don’t want to give up our time, resources, ideas, or prayers to achieve it. We are, in those moments, nothing but screaming children who can’t see our own hypocrisy. Caught in our own inertia, paralyzed by our own fear…or exhaustion…or hunger.
Because we’re hungry. We’re so, so hungry that we feel we can’t move. We want more…or better…or different…and we can see it. We can see the others who sell more, grow more, give more, get more. Why can’t we? Why hasn’t God given us the desires of our heart?
After dealing with a little one who refused food or drink half the day from fear, I have new insight into that. Our beloved Father isn’t withholding what we need. We’re refusing it. We’re not ready. We’re too afraid. We’re too tired. In order to take what he’s offering, we have to move. We have to say, “It’s okay if it hurts.” We have to be willing to do what it takes.
What’s your tooth today? Are you ready to say, “Get it out, Lord, whatever it takes. I trust you.” … Or are you still crying, “Make it go away–just don’t touch it!”?
by Roseanna White | Jun 20, 2013 | Thoughtful Thursdays, Uncategorized
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| The Child Handel by Margaret Isabel Dicksee |
Now, I’ll be honest. I didn’t really want to blog today. I’m ten days out from my deadline, still have 10,000 words to cut from
Circle of Spies, plus another read-through to check for typos, and I’m feeling the pressure. Not to mention that I still need to design a map for the front. And a family tree. Oh, and take care of a lot of WhiteFire business that I’m trying not to neglect.
Yeah. No pressure.
But let’s, again be honest. When am I not pressed for time? LOL. So I tell myself to get over it. And I wonder what to muse on today. Slowly, the realization comes.
Reactions. This here, my blogging when I’d rather keep my nose to the manuscript-grindstone, is a reaction. A thought-out response to an internal debate. Not that big a deal, to be sure, but it’s an indicator of how I react to the stressors in my life. Generally speaking, I moan and groan a little, then I get to work. One thing I thankfully inherited from my family is a strong work ethic. Maybe I’m not out in the fields planting crops or putting in long days at a job site, but from dawn to bedtime, I’m at my computer every moment I can be. Working on one or the other of my many projects. My hubby frequently walks by, sees me still at it, and says, “I wish I loved my job as much as you do!”
When it comes to work, I know my reactions are usually what they need to be. But life, now…those can be harder, can’t they? But the more I pause to consider it, the more I realize that it’s not just our actions that define us, that judge us–it’s our reactions.
It’s not just whether I set out to deal fairly–it’s how I respond when someone deals unfairly with me.
It’s not just that I teach my kids to obey–it’s how I respond when they don’t.
It’s not just that I reach out in love–it’s how I respond when someone lashes back at me.
My hubby has some hard business decisions before him (not for the publishing biz), and we were talking about it yesterday. Talking about how, if it were solely a business decision, the answer would be simple. But being us, we can’t separate business decisions from moral decisions. We need to make sure we’re doing what the Lord wants us to do.
Because when it comes down to it, we’re not judged on how people treat us–we’re judged on how we react to them. Sometimes, that goes against our ideas of “fair.” And we want to think that the world will recognize that. Truth? They don’t. They don’t often care how long we’re beaten up or snarled out. They only care whether we fight or forgive.
Now, God never instructed us to be doormats. So sometimes He’ll call us to fight. To chastise. To punish. But other times, He calls us to relent. And knowing which is right in a given situation requires communication with Him.
As I’m in this time of looming deadlines, it’s so easy to respond poorly. To yell when I should smile, to sigh when I should laugh, to growl when I should get up. But I’m challenging myself today to guard my every reaction, to treat it as if it were an action, deliberated and decided upon. To squelch the off-the-cuff and focus on the from-the-heart.
Because I know it matters. I know that’s what defines me. And I know who I want to be.
by Roseanna White | May 30, 2013 | Thoughtful Thursdays, Uncategorized
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| The Dance Class by Edgar Degas |
It’s a crazy-busy week around here right now, with everything from kids’ checkups to Xoe’s follow-up at Johns Hopkins on Monday. We have ballet rehearsal, ballet recital, I have a book talk on the free night between those…I’ve got book club and my checkup, dentist appointments and normal stuff for church. Oh, and in the midst of all that, I’ve got to get one title for WhiteFire edited, another laid out for press, final edits prepared on a third, and proof approval on a fourth.
Let’s not even look ahead to next week, when I have to start cutting my behemoth of a manuscript by 35K words. (Insert weeping and gnashing of teeth here.)
I’m a little busy. A little overwhelmed. And I don’t know about you, but when I get busy and overwhelmed, I get this strange sensation…I start to feel alone. Like the world is a sea tossing around me, and I’m all by myself on this little boat, just trying to stay afloat. The more emails I answer, the more I wonder why no one is really writing me…the more alerts I get on Facebook, the more it seems no one is paying attention. The more guest-posts I write for blogs, the more I feel like I’m talking into a vacuum. The more appointments I have, the fewer people I seem to see.
This is nothing but illusion in a lot of ways, a trick of my overwhelmed mind, and I know exactly where it comes from. Because in these times of super-busyness, of overwhelm, everything I usually love just feels like One Thing More. One thing more to do that isn’t helping me do what already needs done. One more decision. One more task. One more tap of the fingers on the keyboard.
As I got up this morning with that cloud of To Dos hanging over me, I said a little prayer for some help through it. And I heard a little reminder in the recesses of my mind. Be still.
I’ve always loved that verse–Be still, and know that I am God. It speaks to so much, doesn’t it? And in context it’s even better.
Come, behold the works of the Lord,
Who has made desolations in the earth.
9 He makes wars cease to the end of the earth;
He breaks the bow and cuts the spear in two;
He burns the chariot in the fire.
10 Be still, and know that I am God;
I will be exalted among the nations,
I will be exalted in the earth!
~Psalm 46:8-10
Today, you know what that means to me? That all our strife, all our work, all our mighty deeds are nothing. He makes it nothing. He brings peace where there is none. He wipes out where we build up. But he builds up where we would wipe out. And sometimes, He just wants us to stop so that he can work.
It’s a busy time of year for most of us. So much to do, and not doing it isn’t much of an option. But in this crazy weekend, I’m pausing. For just a breath, just a prayer, just a moment. I’m going to be still and give my heart and all its overwhelm to him. Knowing, trusting that whether I succeed or fail, whether I go or stop, whether I cry or laugh, He is God. He will be exalted among the nations. He will be exalted in the earth.
That means in me, too. I exalt you, Lord. May that remain always the task on the top of my list. My top priority. My anchor on those raging seas. I exalt You.
Roseanna M. White is a bestselling, Christy Award winning author who has long claimed that words are the air she breathes. When not writing fiction, she’s homeschooling her two kids, editing, designing book covers, and pretending her house will clean itself. Roseanna is the author of a slew of historical novels that span several continents and thousands of years. Spies and war and mayhem always seem to find their way into her books…to offset her real life, which is blessedly ordinary.