by Roseanna White | Oct 11, 2012 | Thoughtful Thursdays, Uncategorized
You know how some people never set goals for December because it’s so busy with Christmas stuff? That’s how my October has become. First weekend is Octoberfest at my family’s farm, second weekend is our awesome family reunion, third weekend is my girl-o’s birthday, and the last weekend is always some form of trick-or-treating. And of course, prep for all these things during the week.
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| Punkin’ Chunkin’ at Higsons Farm Octoberfest |
I always know better than to plan anything else on the weekends in this lovely, pumpkin-scented month. But somehow I always manage to fill up the weeks. This year we started Xoe in the Girl Scouts’ Science Discovery Club, we committed to two different Bible studies, and Xoe always goes from ballet one night a week to two in preparation for The Nutcracker this December.
And did I mention I’m trying to finish up a book?
Seems like a lot, but seriously, this is how every October turns out. I distinctly recall last year, we were painting our new/old church’s basement (which naturally fell in October…) and I was ready to pull out my hair. Home school was wearing me down, the book I was trying to write wouldn’t come out right, and I was just feeling overwhelmed and incompetent.
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| Rowyn and my dad giving hayrides at Octoberfest |
This year I’m hanging in there pretty well. I get stressed day-to-day when busyness interferes with my daily goals, but I’ve squeezed it all in somehow. Not saying I deserve a big golden “S” on my chest or anything (I tried to tell Rowyn the other day I was SuperMom, and he looked at me with that “get real” look and said, “No you’re not. You do not have superpowers, Mom.” LOL. Reality check from a 4-year-old!), but I’m feeling more grounded. I’m taking time each day for my devotionals, I’m in a prayer group that helps me keep my focus where it belongs.
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| My girl Xoe (left) and my nieces at Octoberfest |
And I’m having fun. I think that’s a big key. All these many activities going on are all ones I’m excited to take part in. My kids had a blast at Science Discovery, the Bible studies are great groups, and Xoe’s birthday party is going to be a costume party, and she’s super-excited to have a lot of friends coming this year.
And my book is going great, praise be to the Lord. Yes, at this point I’m panicking that I won’t be able to keep it in the right word count, but there’s always trimming. =)
So no startling insights today, but after a sick-day with the boy-o yesterday, and a morning of errands awaiting this morning (must get the ingredients to make my famous Pumpkin Gobs with orange-cream cheese filling!), busyness is on my brain…
What’s your Busy Time? Christmas? Summer? Some random month where everyone in your family decided to be born or get married? 😉 How do you cope with it?
by Roseanna White | Oct 4, 2012 | Thoughtful Thursdays, Uncategorized
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| Degas’s The Millinery Shop – don’t ask me what this has to do with my topic today, LOL. I guess hats are a blessing? |
Yesterday as I emailed my best friend, I shared with her a little sermon I’ve been preaching to myself all week. The subject? Blessings–and how we’re not entitled to them. Naturally, I figure if it’s been occupying my thoughts, I must therefore share it with everyone today, LOL.
noun
1. the act or words of a person who blesses.
2. a special favor, mercy, or benefit: the blessings of liberty.
3. a favor or gift bestowed by God, thereby bringing happiness.
4. the invoking of God’s favor upon a person: The son was denied his father’s blessing.
5. praise; devotion; worship, especially grace said before a meal: The children took turns reciting the blessing.
In my mind, do you know what this makes a blessing? A gift. One given to the person being blessed at no charge, freely. One that ought to be received with grace and gratitude. Certainly when we receive blessings from the Lord, we thank Him for them (or should, right?) and praise Him for His loving kindness and faithfulness.
And when we receive a blessing from another person, we often tell them so, tell them what their gift means to us.
But how often are we like the Israelites in the wilderness? How often do we receive that manna, those blessings, day after day and begin to forget that they’re gifts? That we need to be thankful? That instead of whining for more, we ought to be shouting anew every day, “Wow, amazing! Thank you!”
We get desensitized to the good just as we do to the bad. We start to take long-standing blessings for granted. We go from being amazed by them to expecting them. Then to demanding them. And then to thinking we’re entitled to them, that we deserve them, that, if they stop for a time, we are being neglected or ill-treated or punished.
But we’re not. Seriously, stop and think about it. Were we being punished before those blessings started to flow? No. So if they stop, are we punished then? No. We are simply returning to the status quo. It’s only our perspective that has changed.
Which always reminds me of this part in 1984 where the government has to cut the chocolate ration by, like, two ounces a day or something. (Rationing chocolate! YIKES!) They know the people are going to be upset, so do you remember what they do? First they announce that the ration will be cut by six ounces (okay, I forget the numbers, but you get the idea). The people protest. So they graciously raise it again by four ounces–resulting in the two they needed to cut. And the people rejoice, because they feel like they won back something they had lost, rather than realizing they still came up short.
We do this sort of thing all the time, and in both directions. We can be so far ahead of where we were a short time earlier, but if there’s anything at all we deem negative, backward, then we think we’ve fallen, even if we’re still levels above where we used to be.
But you know what? I think sometimes we need to “lose” something, so that we remember it wasn’t ours to begin with. That it was a gift. That it was a blessing, not an entitlement. We need to remember that sometimes when something is withheld, it isn’t an attack on us. That is isn’t a punishment. That, often, it has nothing to do with us at all. We’re just the hand outheld, waiting for our ration.
A free ration–so who are we to complain if it isn’t delivered one day?
Because when it comes down to it, what am I really entitled to in this world? What do I deserve? What do I have a right to get angry about if it’s withheld? If we’re to trust the framers of the Constitution, it’s pretty basic. Life. Check. Liberty. Check. The pursuit of happiness.
Catch that one? We have the right to the pursuit. Not to the result. That, my friends, often has to be earned. And if it’s given without our earning it…well then, that’s the gift. That’s the free bonus. That’s what ought to make us raise our hands to heaven and shout our thanksgiving.
There are so many things I’m thankful for. And in a normal day, so many things that frustrate me. But this week, I’m working hard to keep them all in perspective. Because God is so, so good to me. I deserve nothing and He gives me everything. I deserve pain and He gives me healing. I deserve to be cast out from Him and He pulls me close.
I’m not entitled to His love or to His blessing. But He gives it. And so do His children. And when they can’t…well then, maybe that’s when I ought to be trying to bless them instead.
by Roseanna White | Sep 27, 2012 | Thoughtful Thursdays, Uncategorized
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| High Expectations by Arthur John Elsley |
Tricky things, aren’t they? Expectations. On the one hand, we’re told to expect great things, especially from God. On the other hand, they can lead to disappointment. Take, for example, these two opposite quotes:
I don’t have expectations. Expectations in your life just lead to giant disappointments.
~Michael Landon
High expectations are the key to everything.
~Sam Walton
An obvious split opinion on this topic. =) And I’m not sure where I come down on it, so I figured I’d think my way through it in a post. Because wherever I’ll end up on it ten minutes from now, it’s a topic on my mind after conference.
On the one hand, I will state definitively that it is good and right and necessary to expect great things from the Lord. Honestly, I don’t know that it’s even expectation so much as faith. Trust that He will deliver what He has promised. Which isn’t usually (sometimes, but not usually) specifics–a nice house or fabulous car or fame–its overarching stuff. He promises that He will be sufficient. He promises that He will sustain us. He promises us that no matter how alone we feel, He is beside us. And because of that, we can expect Him to show up when we come to Him with open arms. We can expect to feel Him move in church. We can expect blessing when we follow Him.
But that doesn’t mean the blessing will look like we expect it to, right?
Because conference is on the brain, I’ll use that as an example. There have been years when I felt there was no need to go, and years I felt I should. Did I always see results? Um . . . maybe, eventually. But rarely like I thought I would. From my first conference, I did indeed sign with my top pick agent. From my second, I got a lot of manuscript requests–didn’t sell to anyone I met there though. At least not that book. 😉 Last year I went and came away with a feeling of “What was the point of that?? I don’t regret going, but…”
See, I think when we get a promise from God, a directive that we obey, we form specific expectations. Like if God says, “Go to the conference,” we expect to come home with a feeling of euphoria from having made that awesome connection or even to get a “Yes!” from an editor there. (It’s happened! I’ve seen people leave with contracts!)
But isn’t that kind of putting God in a box? Saying, “You promised You’d move, so obviously it must be this way.” I know that’s what I’ve done. But it just doesn’t work that way.
We have such finite perspectives. We can only see so far ahead. And usually only straight ahead. Our view is colored by our feelings. And while we can’t get away from that, from the way we’re made, God’s asking us to trust Him. Not to give up our expectations . . . but to never give up on our expectations. Does that make sense? To hold tight to them even when we feel disappointed. To hold to Him. To keep knocking, keep beseeching, keep pounding the gates of heaven. And to do that trusting that the promises are still there. That He’s leading us toward a shining mountaintop, even when all we see is the shadow of the valley.
And we also have to realize that sometimes we never see the true effect, though often enough people hear of it years later. So, so often God calls us to a specific place to meet one specific need of someone else. We obey a directive expecting a tangible result for ourselves. And so can be baffled when we see nothing. But who’s to say we didn’t do exactly what He wanted us to do?
We all deal with expectations every single day. Our own, and others’ on us. It’s the way we’re made, and I think it’s a good way. We ought to expect. We ought to desire. We ought to stand up, reach out, and strive for our goals. But we also must let go of specifics, we must relinquish the idea that we know what God intends. We don’t. We can’t.
But we can know, trust, expect that He’s got a better view of our lives from up there than we do down here. And that if we just listen, He’ll lead us through this maze without running into the dead-ends we tend to ram headlong into. And we can also know that if He leads us into one, it’s to meet somebody there. Or, maybe, to get out of the way of something steaming up behind.
Yes, we’re going to be disappointed when we have expectations. But we’re also going to keep following, wondering where the fruition will come. So expect. Believe. And don’t give up.
What are you expecting today? And what should you be?
by Roseanna White | Sep 25, 2012 | Uncategorized
As promised–my take on the conference. =)
First of all, allow me to say how eternally grateful I am that, though I flew American, my two flights were completely unaffected by all the hullabaloo going on with that company right now. Phew! And to make matters all the more fun, I even ran into two other ACFW-bound ladies waiting at the gate. One of whom had just had a friend of mine design her website for her, and said friend kindly hosted me and my hubby Wednesday night, since they live really close to the airport. He said, “Hey, keep an eye out for Leslie Pain.” And I said, “Riiiiight. Amid the 700 attendees.” So that was pretty hilarious. =)
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| Me, Kim, and Katie at the gala |
My conference started off awesomely with a lunch get-together with my editor Kim and her best friend Katie, who is in the marketing department at Harvest House. We had a great time talking about cats and kids and books and what-comes-next and where their design company finds their costumes and living in city versus country and…anything else that sprang to mind. =) These lovely ladies are so much fun just to talk to! And I of course warned them that I’d be arriving to their table at the gala Saturday night in my super fantabulous historical garb. Which they loved. =) And Kim has a really fun idea for a line of books, so I’m having fun noodling that. Not that I shall breathe a word of what it may be… 😉
Not long after that, my best friend and critter Stephanie arrived, and oh! was it nice to give her a hug for the first time in a year. We had a little time to visit before the conference was officially underway, then off we went to general session. I had to duck out as soon as Michael Hyatt had finished speaking to meet with my rock star of an agent, Karen Ball. Which means that I missed the start of the slide show thingy they put up on the big screens during meals, so was totally oblivious to the fact that Harvest House had created slides for all their new authors, and my face had blasted everyone in super-huge, back-lit splendor. Aaggghh! Naturally, we had to take a picture of it to prove to the folks back home that I wasn’t making it up. 😉
It was great to get to sit down with my agent for a little while too, since Karen is one of the most hilarious people I have ever met in my life. And the other two agents in the Laube agency happened by, so I got the chance to meet them again too and get the oh-so-wise Steve Laube’s take on a few things. (Then on Saturday I got to hear his firsthand account of the big Anchorage earthquake of 1964, which was just crazy!)
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| Me and Diane at the gala, sans coffee stains 😉 |
At this point in my life with ACFW, I know enough people that coming to these conferences is like a great big family reunion. It is
such a blessing to get to hug and exclaim and laugh with all these friends I usually only see through email. Friday was a day of great classes, great friends, and then a great dinner with the Harvest House crew, where I also got to meet the creative genius of the CBD fiction section, Diane. My HH ladies had said to be sure to chat with her so she would remember who I was when it came time for
Ring of Secrets to release, so I graciously offered to spill coffee on her lap so she’d never forget me, but for some reason they vetoed that idea. 😉 Seriously, that was one of the unexpected blessings I got to experience. Diane was a hoot, and apparently it’s adorable to see how excited I get about my story, because all the others at the table were giving me that, “Aw, aren’t you a cute little thing!” look at that point, LOL.
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| Me, Amanda, and Stephanie |
I was thrilled to run into my amazingly awesome teen critique partner, Amanda Barritt, in the bookstore on Friday, and so proud to hear that she got three manuscript requests while there! Go, Amanda!
Friday night I also got to have dessert with the Summerside ladies, and I ended up talking most of the time to Melanie Dobson. I’ve never had the pleasure of meeting Melanie before, so I had no idea how much we have in common! From historical interests to home schooling, we had a great hour chatting about those and many things in between. So new friends definitely = unexpected blessings too.
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| An accidental picture, LOL–this screen followed mine |
But the greatest one came from my hour in the prayer room. I knew when I volunteered for it that it had the potential to be the best hour at conference. See, I’ve been seriously touched, my life altered, by my visits to the prayer room. It was Mary DeMuth’s prayer for me before my meeting with Kim in 2009 that made that appointment go so smoothly. I
know that. And that meeting is what led to the relationship that allowed me to pitch
Ring of Secrets to Kim a year and a half later. Mary likely has no idea the blessing she was to me–but I
so wanted the chance to pay it forward. But I have to say that of all the hours of conference, this was the one that made me nervous. I’ve never done this kind of prayer before, and I was afraid of getting in God’s way, if you know what I mean, LOL. But I put a lot of prayer into it before I stepped foot in that quiet room, and wow. So awesome to feel Him moving there! It was a true
Joy to get to share in others hopes and fears and blessings and disappointments. To open my mouth and wait to hear what might come out. Talk about humbling. Again I was changed by time in the prayer room–even more than before.
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| The Wild Women of WhiteFire |
I enjoyed a chance meeting at lunch with a young writer who was just so much fun (hi, Emileigh!!), who obviously has awesome taste in clothes, as she was wearing the jacket that matched the pants I was wearing, LOL. Emileigh is vibrant and fun and obviously so excited about writing. It was fun to play mentor for a few minutes and share what I’d learned from conferences and the fact that, no, I have no writing system that can be taught in a class, and that’s fine. We don’t all need one. 😉 And then on Saturday afternoon, I also had the opportunity to take my WhiteFire authors for coffee! And let me just tell you, this is one fabulous batch of ladies. We sorely missed those who couldn’t be there, but had a great time with those who were. We’re thinking that if ever the whole group can get together, we’ll need to warn the bystanders that they may just be blinded by the brilliance of all our awesomeness combined. 😉 Seriously, isn’t this a gorgeous bunch of women?
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| Me and my gal Rachel Smith |
Directly after that coffee meeting was the gala, which I’d been waiting for because I love my Edwardian garb. =) So to sum up, a few more fun pictures from that. And the happy thought that though I went to the conference with no big goals other than to fellowship and have fun, I came away with new ideas, reassurances, new friends, a spirit touched by the hearts of others, happy times with my buds and critters, and many chances for fun sarcasm after two dozen people came up to me at the gala and asked, “Are you a historical writer?” What’s a girl to do but answer, “No, futuristic sci-fi/fantasty–can’t you tell?” 😉
And of course, I came home to very excited kids who threw me a little welcome home party. So sweet! So a few more pictures just to round it all out…
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| Me and my amazing agent, Karen Ball |
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| Me and my best friend Stephanie, who had the cutest little purse!! |
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| The first thing I saw upon walking in the door – the Mommy banner =) |
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| Xoe knows Pooh is my favorite, so they found a frame and she drew a picture for me for in it. =) |
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| Yes, most people remember to take pictures before cutting the cake…but you know there’s supposed to be an ‘m’ there, right? |
by Roseanna White | Sep 24, 2012 | Uncategorized
Yay! So great to be home!
I had a fabulous time at the ACFW conference in Dallas, but oh was I glad to come home! I sure missed my hubby and little guys, and it sure was sweet to walk in the door and see that my kids had set up a surprise Welcome Home party. =) They had made a banner that says “Mommy,” made dinner (with the help of my MIL, LOL), bought a cake, and even found a Winnie the Pooh picture frame (he’s my favorite) into which Xoe put a cute little picture she drew. So, so sweet!
I’ll have lots of photos to share as soon as I get the camera I borrowed from my mom back to her house where I can get said photos off said camera, ha ha. Got some of my critters, of the other folks who decided to wear historical awesomeness to the gala, and even of the slide that Harvest House put into the meal-time slide show on the giant screen of my author photo with a “Welcome to the family!” message. Boy was that a shocker the first time I saw myself giant and backlit! LOL
Overall, it was a weekend of amazing fellowship and some unexpected blessings. I’ll tell more about it tomorrow when I can hopefully punctuate with some pictures, and I’ll get back to the regular schedule of events on Wednesday. =) Not quite settled back into routine around here yet, LOL.
Hope everyone had a great weekend!
by Roseanna White | Sep 19, 2012 | Uncategorized
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| Renoir – Two Girls Reading in the Garden |
It’s September 19, 2012. That means that today’s the day I start my trek to the annual ACFW Conference. This year it’s in Dallas. And my flight leaves at 8-something on Thursday morning. Which means I have to get to the airport by 6-something. And since the closest airport is 2.5 hours away…that means we’re heading down the road tonight and staying with friends who live closer to it. 😉
It also, of course, means that usual blogging is put on hold because, while I’m scheduling this early so could, logically, schedule normal programming…well, I’m busy, LOL. I have a lot of things to get squared away before I can go.
And wanted to pause to think about conference. =) It was at my first-ever ACFW Conference in 2007 that I met
Stephanie Morrill, who soon joined my critique group and not long after that eased from mere acquaintance to best friend. At that same conference, I met my first agent, who signed me that following December.
At my next conference in 2009, I met my editor at Harvest House. And pitched her a contemporary, LOL. Needless to say, that particular manuscript was
not accepted by Harvest House, but nevertheless I hit it off with the editor, and checking in on the contemporary allowed me to ask what they might be looking for by way of historical, which eventually lead to
Ring of Secrets. Two years later, yes, but it all came from that first meeting. =)
Last year I got to hang with my then-new agent (first one retired) Karen Ball, meet with my editor at Summerside, hear my soon-to-be-official editor from Harvest gush about the 75% she’d read of
Ring of Secrets and tell me when it would be going to committee. Karen had advised I come prepared to pitch everything I had, LOL, so I met with my requisite two editors that I’d never met before…and kinda had a feeling those meetings weren’t where my next step lay. Which was proven when a month later I got the news about Harvest buying the three-book Culper Ring Series.
This year, my goals are simple. For the first time of my now-four ACFW conferences, I’m not pitching anything. I’m not up for any awards (not that that is a first, LOL). And so I am looking forward to doing all I can to be a blessing to others this year. I’m volunteering more, I’m going to three different publisher get-togethers (including the one I’m hosting for WhiteFire *grins*), I’m hanging out, I’m having coffee, and I’m rooming with that best bud I met in 2007. I’m going for the fellowship. And I’m praying for opportunities to give to others the blessings folks at conferences past have given to me.
And I’m looking forward to sharing with everyone when I get back how God moved this year. Because what I know for a fact is that He will.
Roseanna M. White is a bestselling, Christy Award winning author who has long claimed that words are the air she breathes. When not writing fiction, she’s homeschooling her two kids, editing, designing book covers, and pretending her house will clean itself. Roseanna is the author of a slew of historical novels that span several continents and thousands of years. Spies and war and mayhem always seem to find their way into her books…to offset her real life, which is blessedly ordinary.